If you could wipe your memories would you?  This was the premise of Black Mirror’s first episode about a failing marriage. It’s those same memories that bind us together that can become the wedge in a relationship.

Memories are powerful and as is always the case, luckily we have the power of perspective but when things start to fall apart we as humans tend to go dark. An offense such as a disparaging glance or comment, can cause the dam to break and all of a sudden impounded memories gush without control flooding our mind.

It is here where the problems begin. With out control, our infinitely powerful minds begin to weave a story. If you are angry it is hard to maintain your positive vibrations and the memories become tinted with rage. You no longer are in control and all of a sudden every memory has a twisted perspective and becomes an asset to fuel the anger.

But just as memories can fuel anger, they can fuel love and joy. A loving memory can literally make your heart feel like it’s bursting with the most wonderful emotion. The first time your baby consciously touched your face with his or her little hands, or the time when your friend made you laugh so hard you pee’d your pants. Or, those fledging moments when you have realized that you might very well be one of the most awesome people you know.

Memories exist independently so what if we got rid of all the memories that caused us pain or that made us angry? Would we be unable to make critical survival decisions?

I tend to live my life in the present but being human I have just had the misfortune of the dam breaking and so far where the current is taking me is no bueno. The past is senseless. There is nothing I can do to change it so why go there? Simply put, to build the future.

As we look back and are able to regain our composure and the control over our minds, we can begin to make our new road map with the information we have gained through the painful release that occurred or the joy we felt.

What role are your memories playing in your narrative?